Remembering You: A Poem About Loss, Love, and Grief

I still miss the fuck out of you, dummy.

Remembering You

The first sliver of dawn
Kisses the sage leaves
And persuades frost into dew

Winter sky streaks pink
Lifting from the dusted summit
Whispering, I am still here

The glint of white that leads soaring wings
Circling effortless into swirling thermal
A signpost and a prayer

The skipping record and your laugh
A car wash in the afternoon sun
Familiar song of goodbye

Nineteen years a blip in time
But eternal the binding vine
Reminders of a brief life, lived, loved

But oh, the ache of your vacancy remains
The quiet night is an empty weight
And in those darkest moments I desperately search
While only shadows remain

Vulnerable, searching for a shell
I crawl inside your shirt and curse
Your absence a lance through this armor
The things left unsaid, and all that you’ve missed

Left sifting through a tangled mass of ifs
No beginning
No end
Just knots and fits and fuck this